Then he saw his wife’s face, saw the tears start to fall and suddenly he felt as if he had let her down. Wanting to comfort her, he moved closer. Although he still put his hand to her hair, stroking it as he had always done, she didn’t respond. Bringing his lifeless hand to her lips, Margie told him how much she loved him and thanked him again for being her husband and the father of her children.

Until that moment, Joshua had not understood the true depths of human love although he had thought he had while he was physically alive. What he felt for her now transcended anything he had ever felt.

Speaking to no one particular, Margie whispered that she needed to call the children. So she reached for the phone and began by calling each in order starting with her oldest, Jake. Joshua stood back and marveled at how well Margie still was able to navigate life’s details even when she was so upset. Yes, he had made a very good choice in a wife, he thought to himself again. She will be all right and will help the children cope, just as she always has.

He wasn’t used to being dead yet even though he knew he was. Joshua hadn’t gone down a tunnel like many people who had near-death experiences had said they had. No, he had merely stepped out of his body and looked back at it after he had touched Margie’s hair. A little regret crossed his mind that he had not been able to hold her one last time but the touch of her beautiful red hair was always something he had loved. He laughed as he recalled that her hair color now came from a bottle although he never remembered that much when he was alive.

Alive, he thought, I am still alive. No one met him when he crossed over as some had said would happen to people when they died. He just hadn’t needed anything other than the love of his family.

Joshua had many friends and a very large extended family of which he was very proud. The thought that he would not be able to visit them physically left him a little uneasy but he knew the cancer had caused such pain that he was glad not to have that anymore. The realization struck him that he was truly out of pain.

Margie was crying softly again and making up the bed around him even though Nurse Betty had come back in and told her that the hospital nursing staff would take care of his body now. Joshua walked close to her and put his arms around her back cupping his hands over her breast and heart in a hug in which he thought she would never feel. To his surprise, she placed her hand over her chest in the same area and said, “Joshua, I know you are here with me still. I can feel you and I think you are hugging me now. You are my one true love.”